Don’t Trust a McDonalds That Hides in a Gas Station

What is the number one, singular, “most bestest” thing about McDonald’s? That’s right, breakfast! And I’m not talking about some new fangled pancake-McMuffin concoction that all the kids are eating these days. I’m talking old school man, the originals. Egg McMuffin, Sausage McMuffin, Sauage McMuffin with Egg, and the king of them all……the Bacon, Egg, & Cheese Biscuit! So when you are done with an appointment at the US Consulate that you have waited an eternity for, the “Golden Arches” are a welcome sight. That explosion of flavor that is ready in 5 minutes or less is a perfect idea! So we stop at the corner gas station with the infamous “M” on the wall, find the cute little “mini” McDonald’s inside, step up to the counter, ask if they are still serving breakfast, and……..

If you look really hard, you can see something that is SUPPOSED to be a McDonald's (Photo Credit: Germerican Denglish)
If you look really hard, you can see something that is SUPPOSED to be a McDonald’s                             (Photo Credit: Germerican Denglish)

…….DENIED! “Kein Frühstück*!” No breakfast whatsoever. What a rip off, man. A classic case of fraud. How can this impostor be allowed to pass itself off as a McDonald’s? Call the Polizei* and have these people arrested. I say life in prison!

In all seriousness though, what a bummer. That would have been the perfect finish to a perfect visit to Frankfurt, and all we got was a cup of scalding hot coffee. Oh yeah, the coffee was the best part of the whole deal. Well, the person that served us the coffee anyway. After she denied us our god given right to a joyful breakfast, she decided to be the possibly rudest person I have ever encountered behind a McDonald’s counter. After she mumbled her way through most of the transaction while looking completely annoyed that we were disturbing her morning, she served us 1 coffee and said “bitteschön*”. I responded by politely informing her that we had ordered 2 coffees, at which point she just looked at me like I was a complete moron. So I said it again, because in that situation “bitteschön” means “here is your order”. Your ENTIRE order. And that was obviously not our entire order. Then she mumbled “Yeah, there’s another one coming!” in the snottiest German you can imagine and turned around to wait for it. Well excuse me miss thang, I didn’t mean to ruin your morning by ordering some coffee. Why don’t you take your ass to a German language class before getting all offended!  Sorry, I was ranting again.  I guess good help is hard to find these days.

So what’s the moral of the story kids? A McDonald’s just isn’t a McDonald’s if it doesn’t serve breakfast. And don’t be impatient at the mini McDonald’s near the Frankfurt Consulate!

*GERMAN GLOSSARY

  • Kein Früstuck = No breakfast
  • Polizei = Police
  • Bitte schön = Here you go (in this situation anyway, bitte and bitteschön are very versatile words in German that are used in a myriad of ways)
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2 thoughts on “Don’t Trust a McDonalds That Hides in a Gas Station

  1. They don’t do breakfast at McDonalds here either! I mean, seriously, WTF? Who wants a cheeseburger at 8am?? Well, I guess it depends on the night before, but still 😉

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